Judgemental Walls

Dear Equal Loves,

Boom, boom, boom

goes my heart as I await my wrath.

I fear I cannot escape.

My heels bang against the frame of my bed

just like thunder in a storm.

The anxiety is gnawing at me

like a mouse that has been captured.

The sound of my captors' feet, I can hear

just on the other side of the wall.

Closer and closer they creep.

Powered by fear, I am stone.

I stand as firm as a soldier.

I watch as they scour the room.

Their voices crash against my wall.

The screaming and shouting about this pure awfulness.

I must be like the others, I'm told.

The ones that obey their parents' wishes.

Out of fear, I fall to society's request.

I lock away a part of who I am.

I tell myself it's for the greater good

and that being different is wrong.

Had I not prospered,

my parents would've blamed it on me being "different".

"You are meant to raise a child,"

my mother tells me when she comes to visit.

My body is all she can think about.

Her denial is all I can think about.

I've watched the people I love be questioned about their choices.

I can't help but think of their loneliness

like a chasm that pulls them in.

They are ridiculed and disregarded

as if what they feel has no significance.

Our kind of love has a place in this world,

as all love does.

From my heart to yours,

McKenzie Gost