Just Blink

Just Blink

Heart beating so fast I can hear it in my ears. Pounding like a bass drum.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

I can’t catch my breath, there is a bolder on my chest.

Mind racing in a million different directions , like I’m at a four way stop and I cannot decide Where to go. What to do.

Pressure to figure out what to do when you “ grow up”.

The ceiling and the walls are moving in closer, closer closer.

I’d spent so much time on dead end

,Money , oh, the money .

Flash forward.

Adulting . Do you really know when ?

Is it when you get your first kiss, say I love you for the first time?

Is it when you graduate college, buy an apartment, pay your own bills, get married?

Legally , its 18. You can vote. Buy cigarettes, yet you can't drink ? .

I don’t think you know. It just happens. You blink , and you’re a grown up.

You’re paying for classes , books or a new car and a apartment.

Flash forward.

You’re paying off loans , looking for a job.

Where they say they want at least a year of experience , but you wonder how to get the experience if no one will hire you ?

Welcome to the grown up world. Where you’re tired when you wake up , go to a job that you did not earn a degree for and playing off over 60,000 in debt living in your parents basement.

Maybe that’s when you realized you are grown up.