The L Word

Love is a fickle thing

That's what they say at least

I'm inclined to believe

Cuz loves never come easy to me

It's always there

Around every bend

Every crusty corner

And rough textured tree

It’s always peeking its head out

But it doesn't always latch on

I've seen it

I'm sure you have too

And you might be thinking

What’s this crazy girl on about?

I’ll tell you

I'm talking about love because it’s so foreign to me

My mother loves me, ya

I’ve a best friend too and she’s my everything

But you see

that’s it for me

I can feel their love in their hugs

And their kisses

I can see their love

On the chalk they smear on the blackboard walls

But my reciprocation is something they may never be able to perceive

I love them

I do

But i'm so messed up

My love’s twisted

My dad did that

He turned me sour to all that softer stuff

I'm always sad, stressed, and stretched thin

If I’m not working I ain't anythin’

If it’s genetic or conditioned I haven't a clue

But I’m always cold

Distant

Not suitable

I’ll be having a grand day

I’ll smile

Feel good

Than they’ll show up

Mouth wide grins

Bein’ all silly

And at first I talk

Laugh

Crack a Joke

But it’s not right

I’ll get dead in the eyes

My mind numb

Their stories start grattin’ me

I just wana be alone

So I do the only thing I know how

I go all grumpy

I get hurtful

And they just take it

My mum's the worst

She never talks back

She never talked back to him either

But I’m not him

...am I?