Last chance

Thirds times a charm, a phrase I know by name, a saying that has follow's me everywhere I go, there is nowhere that I can go to escape it, my last chance to escape I passed up so long ago, that I no longer know, when I was offered freedom from this place, the dreaded rule of three, the duo of failures, held up by one success, the raft that keeps them afloat, that keeps them from sinking under, due to their countless blunders, my last chance has once again extended its hand, offering me my wish to escape this life, I guess thirds times a charm, but I cant find it in me to just up and leave this house I built, the memories that it holds, mean everything to me, but this is my last chance to escape this life, to be able to live again, to see the world, to do things right the first time, without the shame of failing, of waiting for my third and final try to find the power in me to succeed, to feel the joy of getting first place, to be the first one in the door,.. and the last one out, to feel the satisfaction of making it on the first shot, no retries, or do-overs first time winners,… but I just can't seem to find it in me to leave all this behind, all the work I've put in to this house after it came crumbling down twice over before the brick in mortar would stay, all the blood, sweat and tears that paint the walls, that show how hard I worked for this, how many times I had to start over, so why at the end of the day why cant I find it in me, to just up and leave this place and live in paradise, what keeps me here in this house of failures, and hard earned success why can't I find it in me to leave it all behind for the high life, why am I giving up my last chance at a better life, my chance to turn it all around, to fix it all, to do some renovations, to touch up on some things, to add a new coat of paint, so why can't I find it in me to leave it all behind, to leave it all in the past, and walk the road of success, but my last chance to escape this life has past long before they extended their hand to help, I've put too much in this house to throw it away, all the memories it holds mean more to me than any amount of success, something that ease of living couldn't ever possibly give to me, so that is why I stayed, and gave up my last chance to escape.