Last Summer,

Last summer I 
drank my heart away 
and my insides became soggy. 
Sitting against alcohol my 
throat became dry 
on days I should have been sober. 
My hands gripping new cups felt like 
I've won a new prize 
and with a menacing smile I 
poisoned my lungs a bit more 
made them soak up the bitterness a bit longer.

Last summer you 
were on my mind for as many days 
as I could remember 
and only once a week the suffocating 
idea of you took breaths 
and left an empty space in my head.
I realized I loved you 
and when I became sober again I 
wanted to tell you in hopes that 
you'd run back to me 
but 
truth becomes outspoken when the mind 
is intoxicated with burns of liquid stead 
and I didn't to reveal too much of what 
my insides can barely grasp 
so I kept to myself 
and my demons swam in the bliss of 
sugary waters drownng these 
butterflies that had sank at the pit of 
my stomach 
no longer feeling a damn thing.