Late Night Facetimes

the call comes in at eight 

and its not that late

your face glows in the blue l.e.d.'s

your smile when it conncects shines like the sea

cold yet sparkling at the same time

i see it in your eyes

intentions not so pure

time passes and its nine

you say you love me

and my heart skips a beat

but how is it that you love  me

when you dont even know who i am

you couldnt tell me my favorite color or what i like to do

but your favorite color is red

and you like taking women to bed

you are in all consideration a whore

but who am i to judge

ten oclock comes running up

you are playing a zombie game

and im sitting here wondering why boys are so lame

you said we're just friends

yet call me your girl and confuse me with your mixed poetry.

eleven comes far too early

your quoting tik tok to me 

and your pretty brown eyes stare into my ocean ones

you scrunch your nose up when you lose a game

and constantly demand a rematch.

midnight comes thru

and suddenly we start losing our clothes

gazing at each other thru a phone screen 

your voice rumbles and catches my attention 

its your begging and pleading 

it lures me in like a siren calling to sailors.

one am comes with manipulation and gaslighting

'why are you texting other guys'

'well you are hoe five'

' why are you friends w him'

little did he know that i was second guessing

him and me from rumors and tea 

two glides thru w yelling over the phone

its the constant blame that you can't see me in person

but we are in the middle of a fucking pandemic

i asked that you respect my health boundraies

and yet you manipulate me into thinking that my concerns are stupid

its three right now

im freezing and tired

you drain me mentally

but its the way you smile at me

its the way you make eye contact w me

its the way you comfort me 

its the way your nose twitches when you lose a game

its your laugh when i do something goofy

its going to be four soon

its the way you call me names hwen youre upset

its leaving me on open for days on end

its knowing that i basically mean nothing to you

its you talking to other girls yet getting jealous for me

We are toxcicity in the purest form

We will never work

You use me because you know ill always be there

you use me because you are bored 

i use you because i crave attention

i use you because i think that this is what i deserve.