leaping over obstacles

I trusted you with every secret feeling or thought You were the pages of diary, my confidant, and my friend I sought comfort in you and you swore you’d always deliver. We had our ups and downs but don’t all people in love Isn’t true that true isn’t true if your true love doesn’t fight with you So I over looked it I let go of every fight, forgive and forget right? Numerous times I said it was the last time But your smile and sweet voice changed my mind I still trusted you and loved dearly You still had my heart So when you got in touch of course I was excited I had missed you so much and I had no way to contact you I prepared for your visit absolutely ecstatic I wouldn’t spend my birthday alone Only a few weeks left but honestly that didn’t matter in moments you would be at my door And that was all that matters When you finally arrived my heart was beating a mile a minute and I had butterflies When you walked into my room and hugged me and my safety was back I was secure again. After everything I felt that you still cared Even though I was soiled as they say and the baby wasn’t yours Though in a way I was a murderer, in my mind at least, my stress killed my little baby But you said you still loved me But actions speak louder than words I said no, I said it many times But that didn’t stop you You said you had something to prove and I was terrified I couldn’t imagine how my only protection was now my attacker I didn’t think it would happen to me And definitely not by you But you had a gun and a silencer so nobody would hear Was it for me? Would you have killed me? I wished you would’ve that way I didn’t have to live to remember I felt filthy afterwards and betrayed I was shaking and crying and scared You got so angry at my resistance and tossed me around like a rag I meant nothing at that moment not to you or to myself And I honestly I never thought I would recover Surprisingly however I did I learned to smile again I accepted your half ass apology but just to get one was enough for me My story wasn’t going to end in that bed that horrific night In fact that’s when my story began All my heartache and losses will lead to my great victory I forgive I swear I do, and somehow in a way I still love you Thank you for my story and pushing over into abundant victory