Lemonade Isn't Sweet

Lying on the floor

My hands wrapped around my throat

Face rapidly red

Tears flowing a watery blue

Heart is nonstop pacing

Sickened of you

I don't know what it is I'm trying to do 

Quite literally holding back the words

Fresh like orange juice,

I squeezed and squeezed

Nothing stops the pain or the choked sobs

Tons of words left unsaid

Clouding the thoughts inside my head

Which is why I sob and sob

Because knowingly,

if I said those words

I could never take them back

That's why I'm holding on for dear life

I don't want to let the demons escape

So here I sit, shaking

Afraid to let my hands go

Gripping tighter and tighter

The funny thing is that it wasn't you

It was my own words killing me

As I fake a smile on my glowing face

Frowning impatiently at me,

You say, 

"Darling can you finally pass the lemonade?"

And once again, I snapped back to reality