lessons

was it 

my first heartbreak

(it sent me shivering into loneliness for awhile)

or was it my first song

i was so young then, 

i barely understood the point of music

you taught me more than i even understand now

you still do

i think you always will

listen--

it's not about "getting it"

it never has been

the lesson you taught me has always been

that i don't need the answers

for closure with the question,

to let go,

to be okay

that i'm allowed not to

for some time

that i am worth something

that language has power

and that power is meant to be used wisely

not wasted

not abused

the lessons you've given me--

i cannot repay you

but to treat you well

always.