Lessons from my Mother

My mama said don’t see bad as good, and don’t look at bad through rose colored glasses. For roses have sharp thorns that hurt when first touched, yet their pain is easily forgotten while you watch the blood drip from your finger and forget what it is to be healed and healthy.  

My mama said don’t let other’s dysfunction become the function of your life. Don’t let the things that so easily entangle strangle you.

My mama said that when I meet a man he should reach for my heart, that way he knows where my passions lie and what makes me cry out in pain. If he goes grasping for something else first, then he is intending to self satisfy.

Cause my mama said not to use my body as a currency but a ministry. To use my hands, my feet, my mind to serve others in need, not to serve the self centered greed that so easily entangles the heart.

My mama taught me how to build healthy relationships, not to jump on ships with drunken and delusional captains.

My mama taught me how to endure through the rough seas of life. Not to look down at the dark, deadly, and swirling seas below my feet but to look ahead at the bright light shining from the light house where the Keeper awaits my arrival.

My mama taught me to love those who hate me, for only then can I be free.

She taught me that when I do wrong, not only to ask for forgiveness from those I have wronged but to forgive myself, for only then can I spread my wings and not be ashamed to fly. To touch the sky with the tips of my fingers and know what freedom really feels like.

Cause my mama said that when the world starts to crumble, stand up, yet be humble. Do not apologize for illuminating the lies, the hurt, the pain that hide in the darkest corners of the closets of little children and adults alike. Not to apologize for bringing truth to what is false.

My mama taught me that I am valuable and that my value is not dependent on the varying variables that one day say size zero equals beautiful, because real beauty has zero to do with waist size.

My mama said not to get proud to the point of ignorance, to the point where I believe that I am indestructible, bullet proof against the bullets of life. Because as soon as I think I am, I throw away my armor. She said this doesn’t mean I should live in fear, just that I shouldn’t live in pride induced ignorance. Now anyone can fall and everyone will fall, but the victor is the one who jumps back up, brushes off their bloodied and bruised knees, and says “that could have been worse,” not the one that stays down and drowns in the self pity of their own tears.

My mama said don’t always take the freeways in life, for life will go by too fast. Take the side roads and the byways; make your own way in life. You will then see the grandeur of the mountains, the depths of the valleys and the canyons, the blues and greens of the ocean, and feel the salty air in your face and hair. For the freeways bypass these. They cause you to be distracted with the billboards surrounding and the blaring horns pounding on the drums of your ears, the traffic that controls the flow of your life, the signs that constantly tell you you’re just not good enough.

She said be at peace with your life, don’t try to lease someone else’s. Be content with the quiet of life; don’t get caught up with gossip and strife by searching for dead bones in the back yards of others.

My mama said dedicate yourself not to what is false and fake, but to what is genuine. Focus on what is real and true, not on the lies and schemes that can trap you.