Let Me be Me

Wed, 11/06/2013 - 19:16 -- aelise

Location

Let me be me

Stop criticizing every move I make

Stop judging me, without fair play

You make me out to be the villain

Though I am the victim

For years you acted out

Forcing me to stay and listen to all your complaints, your whines, you tired voices, and your yells

While, I, not utter a word

But inside I felt like screaming for freedom from this place

Never, have I constantly complain and bring down others with my words

Never, have I told others my inner and personal issues

I kept it all inside, like a ditch being filled with acid

You have no clue what’s inside me, my body or mind

You always go on about what you’ve done for me, and what you’ll take

Well I’m tired and I’m sick of it

Stop doing things for me, and take what you want away!!!

Will I utter these words, of course not, because somehow I would be in the wrong?

You say it’s because of my age and how I am

Well, it’s not about my age, and I’m okay being me,

There’s no one else I’d rather be

The real problem is everything around me

It’s constant and refuses to go away

The gossip, the health, the brat, and social

Too much drama for my taste

Let me be me,

If I step out of line don’t fuse like it’s the end of the world

If it happened days maybe a week ago just let it go

What’s the point of bringing back yesterday?

You and I both know it won’t come back, so why waste time on it

Let it go and move on

I’ve already have

Is it so much a problem that I’m not like others?

That I don’t act like the kids in my school, that I don’t have much of a social life, that I’m not anyone’s average 15 year old, that the only real friends I have are miles away

If it is a problem, then stop trying to make it your problem, your business

Its mines not yours

If it’s a problem in my business let it be my burden

So what if I don’t act like those other kids, I am me, and my personality is not theirs

SO what if I don’t have much of a social life, it doesn’t make me a freak

SO what I’m not anyone’s normal 15 year old, I’m not supposed to be, I’m supposed to be me,

And so what the only real friends I have are miles away, at least they unlike most of the people I meet and won’t befriend, will never turn their backs on me, betray me, and leave me in the forgotten dust of faded memories

See a true friend to me takes time to make, it’s not immediate like most, but that’s okay, at least I’m trying to be safe

If you don’t see my way, then you just don’t see

Accept it anyways

I have no need for your rude, negative comments,

They will do me no good

I’ve learned that I just need to be me, because all those years ago I was focused on what others thought of me

That if I did something out of step then it would be over

Back then their words were like kryptonite, slowly killing me for days, even after the words were said

I would think about those words, and those words hurt

I hated it so, that I created a bubble for just myself

To keep away the danger of others, yet it didn’t work

For years I did everything I was told, always did my best and yet where did it get me

A pile full of rewards and a reputation, which I rather could care less about

My image to others was a snooty girl who thought little of others

But now things are different, I’ve come to a realization in my mind

It doesn’t matter what others think of me, I’m fine the way I am

That I shouldn’t keep all of my emotions inside of me, because it will break me

Stop listening to everyone crude comments, they‘re not god

I’m me, and I have to remember that in the long run

Because when the world has turned its back on me

And I’m forced into the corner,

The only person I can turn to for help is myself

And like a phoenix, who has been beaten down, broken, and has been droned in the pool of insanity

I’ll burst into flames, and rise anew, healed of all of yesterday’s wounds, and stand on my own two feet

I vow that no matter what I will survive this game we call life.

Guide that inspired this poem: 

Comments

Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741