Let Me Go!

I feel so hopeless, helpless, and defeated. These thoughts are running through my head on a constant cycle. There holding me captive, but I want them to let me go! I don't wanna be in here anymore! Just let me go! I don't understand what you want from me except to eat away at me from the inside, trapping me in so deep it's unbearable. This is my plea, please, please, please let me go! Let me enjoy my life without my mistakes, and failures, and embarrassments hanging over my head and tearing me apart slowly every day. These thoughts are so painful, and they kept coming up every so often, and I tried to control this on my own, but in reality, I was failing day after day. When I decided that I couldn't do this on my own or control my own thoughts, the only thing I could do was to put this in my Father's hands. My heavenly father pursued me when I thought I wasn't worthy of being pursued. Jesus loved me when I thought I couldn't be loved. He died on the cross for me when I should've been nailed to that cross; he stood in the place of judgment where I should've been. What my infinite mind, and what seemed so absurd at its surface, that something, a thought that is too big to fathom, that someone, some man, a Savior who came to save the souls of man, would do this for me? To go to the cross and die for me to take away my sins so that I could be a new creation, and the righteousness of God? To have 7inch nails driven through his hands and feet, to have a crown of thorns struck on his head, a spear pierced to his side? Why would he do this for me, a sinner? All of my questions have been answered by simple truths of the Bible; God's Holy Word. They are this: Christ did this for me because he loved me. God sent his ONLY SON down to earth to save the souls of man. My mind cannot ever and will never be able to fathom such a thought as this. We may think this is just absolutely absurd, but let's be honest, no parent would ever just give up their child to die for humanity. To have 7inch nails driven through their hands and feet, a crown of thorns struck on their heads, and a spear pierced to their side. I want you to reflect on this for a few minutes if not longer, because what Jesus went through for you and me is gruesome that we COULD NEVER EVER no matter how much we think we can; we can't wrap our minds around but we can rejoice in victory for Jesus has already won the battle and we didn't have to do anything, or endure anything, and THAT my friend, THAT is something that is worth living for! Come to Christ, repent, and believe in your Savior DIED FOR YOU ON THE CROSS TO SAVE YOU AND TAKE AWAY YOUR SINS!!! Come to Jesus, and you will begin to see change. For anyone out there that is struggling, I want to let you know that your not alone. Reach out, ask questions, talk to someone you trust, open up God's Word, and find encouragement in the scriptures. You aren't alone in this fight. Let Christ take over and give him your life, and he will fight your battles for you; you just have to be silent. (Exodus 14:14) Soli Deo Gloria!