Let's Not Stay In Touch

I gave, and you took

I was young and stupid, that’s how the story goes

Some starry eyed girl waiting for her happily ever after who falls too hard too fast and ends up with her dreams crushed just like her heart

But that’s not our story, is it?

I gave, and you took

You took, and you took, and you took, and I thought that was what Love was

I thought love was me crying myself to sleep because of the hateful words you spewed, suffocating my heart, sleeping into my bones, blackening my very soul

Love was me telling you my deepest secrets, giving you the key to my locked heart only for you to hit me where it hurt the most

Love was me lying to my parents about why I was breaking down in the middle of the day, saying it wasn’t my sobs that they could hear through the locked door

It wasn’t me who was breaking down, losing herself piece by piece

It was some other girl.

Lying to myself so I could believe the lies you were telling me

Lying to myself so I could hide in a lovely fantasy away from dark reality

Every lie eventually unravels

I wanted to forgive, to forget every transgression, every hateful word, every tear that fell in the middle of the night when I was trying to hold myself together, one minute at a time

But, this isn’t a fairytale, is it?

You didn’t realize what you had, until it was gone. Until I was gone

I didn’t realize what I had left, until I felt the shackles fall from my neck, the claws finally gone, my mind clear

I didn’t realize what I had left, until you contacted me day and night, trying to apologize and be friends once again, something more eventually

I’m sorry, thank you, but let’s not keep in touch