-A Letter to my 5 month old cousin-

When you asked me why I have no dad I froze. I forgot about the ten tiny toddler toys we played with and I froze. I froze to forget, I froze to remind myself that there’s nothing wrong with my situation. I tried to explain to this small sensational child that there is nothing wrong with having two moms but I got tonged tied. I got twisted and torn by a tiger in my voice. I tried to change the subject but you did it for me. All those zooms in your voice reminded me of what could have been. Those zooms remind me of the zooms I could have shared with my dad. What could have been, my mind races to the zooms in your voice? But what if there's nothing to find. I sit in front of pale tiles, I imagine myself sinking through them, to a depth that I cannot understand. I look at his eyes. Wide and frail. Eyes that could never understand the scene of this poem. I've never understood how his mind works. I've never understood how his mind works. I’ve never understood how his mind works. But the truth hurts. This truth hurts like the feeling I get when I read this poem. The truth hurts, the truth hurts, the truth hurts like the feeling I get when I fail to finish this poem.