Listen To Me

Do you not hear my heart beating? My soul screaming? The pain screeching from the inner abyss? Those voices in my head, laughing Silently laughing, at my humiliation I tried not to listen, yet it made it worse “I hate you!” they screamed With images of my parents, loved ones and friends Beginning to morph and take to their form I tried not to think about it, yet it made it worse I knew they “loved” me, but my insecurities prevented Me from believing, actually believing this fallacy. I wish they would listen to me Did they not hear my heart beating? My soul screaming? The pain screeching from the inner abyss? That feeling of worthlessness filled me to the brim Like a cup runneth over Every day scars, hideous, ugly scars were made Into my flesh and my mind. Kids yelled their ignorant words Tears and bloods stream down my body. They fall to the floor like rain drops. I hated them, I hated myself even more. I tried to destroy myself, knives as sharp as their words Cut deep into my veins They watched while I cried, bleeding a awful red flower They ignored it, passed by it like a fly on the wall. I wished they listen to me Didn't they see my heart beating? My soul screaming? The pain screeching from the inner abyss? Who was God? And where was He? Why did He leave me broken, tortured, ashamed? Was it a joke? A sick form of entertainment? I’m sure He was laughing, probably had tears in His eyes. Look at the skinny, weird, tall black girl. See how she looks? See how she’s inferior? See how awkward she is? Those dark voices, rumbled, rose out of the darkness. They grew to overpower everything else. Oh how I wish He Listen to me? Did He not hear my heart beating? My soul screaming? The pain screeching from the inner abyss? Well since no one listened No one bothered to hear me, nor seemed concerned. Maybe I should slip into a deep sleep? Slide into the inner black hole and stay dormant there. For the end of time. The pills caused my numbness immediately. The half bottle of pure Mexican Tequila created a instant warmness, it engulfed me. I laid on the soft white, carpet of my parent’s bedroom. And I laid still. I cried and laugh hysterically. Imagining the faces of those who drove me to my INSANITY!! Saying my prayers to God, telling Him I’m sorry Sorry that I wasn't fit enough to survive, for wasting his time. The voices’ laughs grew louder, more demonic Till finally the blackness and cold toke over. Now you can’t hear my heart beating Nor my soul screaming And the pain is no longer screeching down from the inner abyss. There is just sounds of a woman screaming. Screaming “Baby please COME BACK!” The sound of silence and sirens filling the still air. The voices have won and yet they continue to laugh hysterically. Why didn't listen to me? Couldn't you just listen to me?