The Little Things

I spend a lot of time looking at flowers

It’s so important to savor the little things at a time like this

I don’t know how long I spent sitting here. Seconds, minutes, hours?

Eventually, I pull myself up, grab my gear, sigh and walk away

I’ve got to keep moving, even though the only thing I want to do is to stop

My entire life since the event a few years ago has been hit and misses

I’ve survived, more or less, even though inside I feel dead

But I’ve got to keep moving, got to stay one step ahead

One step ahead of the gangs, ahead of the storms and ahead of the mobs

I’ve tried to be in a group. A dozen of us survivors working together to survive

But it’s never worked out; no one left any of those groups alive

Except me

Groups fall apart, people get killed

I’ve learned that lesson the hard way. More times than I’ve liked

So I try to stay away from groups, I do still.

I’m all alone out here, alone with my crimes.

Sometimes I wonder if it’s even worth it

What is life with no one to count on or share a smile?

Eventually I forget about it because of a new trouble I’ve hit

Here, there isn’t really much time to sit and be idle.

Which, ironically I’m glad of

Because I think I’d be dead otherwise

If I wasn’t constantly fighting for my life

I’d be too busy thinking about my eventual, brutal demise

Thankfully, it rarely gets to that extreme

So I just keep fighting, surviving another day

Sometimes I miss my childhood where I could just sit and play

Oh, why did the world have to turn out this way?

I used to have such a great vision of the future in days past

Where did we go wrong? What lead us down this path? I ask

I don’t expect an answer and I’m never granted one

It’s a question no one can answer. The world’s just done

I still hold out hope, however stupid that may be,

That the world might just might get better...eventually

I know it’s a slim chance at best, maybe one in a million

But my chances of surviving without this hope are one in a billion

So I just keep on surviving, living to fight another day

Because maybe, just maybe, someday the world will get better someway

I hope.