I am a lone wolf

Who howls at the moon

Desperately hoping for a returning call.

Where will he put his trust and faith?

Where will he go?

When he lost everything what goals did he set?

What did he seek out?

The lone wolf now cries at the moon not for a return call but for God, begging for a reprieve from the pain of isolation.

But no matter how loud he screams, no one can hear his suffering.

There was a time when this was not so.

The lone wolf reflects on his days with the pack.

Reflects on what went wrong.

And what he himself could've done to stop it.

Or restrained himself from doing

Mistakes he made

Opportunities he neglected

The wolf wonders if he is even capable of loving again

He feels nothing for anyone.

But he wishes he could have felt for them all

The lone wolf understands his curse and feels helpless to the strings of fate.

He knows that there is no hope for his weary soul and no escape from the hell he has created for himself.

He is left only to wallow in self-loathing.

The wolf will let no one else through the walls he has created around his heart for he is afraid of history repeating itself.

He knows he cannot dwell on the past if he wished to live in the present and look to the future, but he feels as if his memories are the only consolation he has left.

His only option is to wait for and sometimes even hope for death to steal him from the cold earth he lay upon.

Death, who will shield him from the rain by placing him beneath deaths black ragged cloak.

He looks beyond his cave entrance where he lives in solitude to see only rain and storms

The wolf cannot comprehend what the sun will look like on the horizon because he cannot see past the walls he himself created in his own life, heart and soul.

Is this all that life is? He asks himself.

All this pain all this suffering?

Was this fate his doing?

What say he?

 "Fate be damned."

He will walk toward the horizon with open arms leaving everything behind and he will burn the bridges that he crosses on his journey and he will not look back for he already knows what lay there, but is curious as to what there is to behold beyond the thin line that divides the sky and land

The lone wolf considers retracing his steps because he cannot help himself.

But none shall hinder his quest.

He has walked.

He walks now.

He will walk again.

I am a lone wolf seeking happiness, purpose and love be it tomorrow or an eternity from now.

Still I will walk.

Forever.