Looking Up To You

Since I was born, I've always looked up to you.

Two years older than me, and two feet taller than me.

Just a little girl, blessed with a big brother to protect me.

As we grew up, we fought and bickered as siblings do.

You won almost every fight, but I continued to challenge you to another.

I wanted bragging rights, "I just beat my big brother!"

There were times when I told people, I wouldn't notice if you were gone.

We barely talked to each other, as our hours at home never coincided. 

I did my thing with school and softball, and you did yours working all the time.

I wish I could take back things I said, and time we didn't spend together.

Eighteen is painfully young for a life to end, especially my big brother.

I know it was an accident, you would never leave us on purpose.

Memories are all I have left, and I never knew how much they would mean.

If only you knew the number of lives you touched, especially your little sisters.

I wish I could tell you one last time, how much I really loved you.

Now i am still just a little girl, missing a part of me.

I stand tall everyday for one reason, and one reason only.

I am always to looking up to my big brother, up above me in heaven.