Losing Someone Close

I dont know if I should cry,

or just kill myself.

But Im not going to talk like that,

because Im not that crazy.

But now that I think about it,

killing myself dont sound sound to bad.

What do I have to do,

to prove to you,

that I dont want to lose you?

How far must I go?

I understand that all feelings are involved, and its all for the best.

But if all feelings were really involved,

you wouldnt want to lose me.

I dont want to lose you.

And me,

being a women,

a strong women,

Im still sensitive.

But I dont want my pride to get in the way.

I dont want to make it seem like I dont care.

But I dont want to cry in front of you either.

I dont know,

where to go,

or where Im going after this,

but I wish you the best.

Even though it discusts me how you can let go

of someone so close

so easily.

Im not saying you dont care. (even though you prbably dont)

But I know how it feels to lose someone.

And who in the world would want to feel like that?

It doesnt feel good.

It hurts.

But all I know,

is I dont ever want it to happen again.

So Im going to let you be.

Im going to let you go.

I want to say the feeling is mutual. (but its not)

I will endure from this.

I will grow from this.

I will learn from this.

I will live after this.