Losing You

Losing you was like losing a piece of me

Losing you was like making a puzzle without a piece

Losing you was like running a marathon without the directions

Losing you was like sinking in quicksand

I still remember the color of your eyes

I still remember the sound of your voice

It was like velvet to my ears

It made me melt sometimes

I don’t know why I fell for you

You made fun of me all the time

You basically called me worthless

But I was like a puppet and you were like my master

When you weren’t around I didn’t know what to do with myself

Then you left for good

When you left a piece of me died

When you left I didn’t speak for days

When you left I was in disarray

I couldn’t speak your name

You were a villain

I was too dumb to see the pain you made me feel

I blamed myself for failing you

But in fact you failed me

I was never enough for you

No matter what I did it just wasn’t enough

I would cry at night because I knew I could never make you happy

I cried myself to sleep

You told me goodbye and I was silent

You had done this before and I thought you’d come back

But you left and that was the end

My heart was left to feel the sting

But in fact I didn’t feel anything

It’s been a year now and it still hurts like it was yesterday

I still cower when someone says your name

You blocked me on everything because you said it was too much

I just watched because I was stunned

Your name has six letters

Those six letters I like to skip over

The alphabet to me has twenty letters

If we count your last name I have to skip four more

Plus the letters I skipped before

Now the alphabet has sixteen

I can’t listen to my favorite song anymore

You’re the one who played it for me

I can barely listen to music because I think of you

My heart doesn’t beat like it used to

It beats a little slower and takes a little longer

Sometimes I forget I’m alive

I’ve dated people after you but I never feel the same

They always leave because they know I’ll never love them

I feel so alone without you

I should have known you’d leave that day you told your girlfriend I meant nothing

That was when we were friends; I should have let go before I got hurt

I let you stab me time and time again until you got tired of me

I let you in again and again until you finally left

First I was relieved the pain was finally over

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks

You wouldn’t be coming back for me

I wasn’t enough for you to fight for

That dreadful day in March

Now I haven’t applied to colleges

I didn’t take the tests to get in

I gave up my dreams because you were the one who told me to have them

I can’t go to the college I planned to

I can’t even pay attention in class

I barely even speak

Cause of that dreadful day you left me

You came back a few months later

Telling me you had someone

You told me you wanted me back

Sadly I believed you

You broke down my walls again

Then you left me broken all together

Many months have gone by

I still can’t say your name

I still can’t smile

I still don’t laugh

You go through my mind at least once a day

Who am I kidding you never leave

Cause of that chilling day in March