Lost

Unbothered,

Unmoved,

Unseen from reality.

Cloaked in a dense fog of desensitization,

I can hear the construction of walls being thrown up around me,

Yet I'm blind to my own mind. 

I can’t stop myself…

Driving in a thunderstorm of vehemence,

Tormat seeps into the rain,

Lightning flashing light on the pain,

A loud crash of thunder sweeps the environs of what's to come. 

My grip on the steering wheel loosens,

I’m driving blind into a cognitive I’ve known my whole life,

But was always locked. 

I want to let go,

No longer yearning to be in control of where I go,

Or who I am. 

For now,

I will let you decide who I am. 

You,

Who made this storm,

You,

Who put me in this car,

You,

Who showed me why. 

Why I’ll never trust again,

Never give myself fully,

Never look back,

And never regret. 

I’ll let you take the wheel,

I will let you pick where we go.

Because I have no one else to trust,

No one else to guide me,

Or show me any different.

So for now, 

I will learn to trust you,

Even if you hurt me,

I will learn to love you.