Lost and not wanting to be Found

I try so hard

to please myself.

It's about me,

yes I am selfish,

and yes I am egotistical,

but in the end

was it really me I was thinking about?

Who knows what I think,

but me.

Who knows what I feel,

but me.

But I still don't know myself.

Do I?

I want direction,

but refuse to listen.

I want answers,

but don't ask questions.

I need something,

but what is it!?

What is it?

What

will

it 

be

in

the

end.