lost in place

(manifesto for the meek)

today my tea tastes of apathy.

my toast and jam, 

so bland.

i note the watch

that tells my time 

is on the other hand.  

the sky is dark, 

can’t find the sun,

although it’s nearly one.  

and empathy

all starts with me.

still, sympathies they’ve won...

i must move on,

full forward stride,  

though nothing truly changes,  

i think as i  

just settle in

and logic rearranges. 

we safely say,  

why dare reflect? 

cold comfort-calmed and sated,

or shift?

because 

you’ll find we’re blind  

to fictions that they’ve fated.  

libido-waxed,   

albedo-waned   

eclipses in our eyes,

sunglasses shade

the never-made

keen kisses from the skies.  

lost love,  

or that

which was never had

it hurts, we all agree.

yet some mistake

that latent ache

for chaste authority.

people will judge.

people will be.

okay, but fuck those haters.

such thoughts can cull  

with vacuum-pull  

designs of space invaders.  

those talking heads,

suborbit bound,

will rant and scream and scratch.  

while we consume

their peddled doom

and don a pointless patch.

marching orders 

flung 

from here to there,

and yet, i’m frozen still…  

i will not bow  

to lesser-thans.  

confused,   

but not a shill.

staunch viking true,  

no matter who  

should fail to understand.  

cuz in my head,  

the home team screams,  

i’m first,   

– i’ve claimed this land!  

all this, my friend,  

from where i stand,  

no need to move or bend.

i know this house,   

i know this room,

but space,   

it does not end.

nor twist, nor fold,  

nor acquiesce.

that’s why i pause to tread  

toward skyborne thoughts  

that free my feet,  

yet pebble down my head.  

alas, i’m stuck.   

thick starry space  

clinging to my heels.  

with lunar mines,  

venusian blinds,

forgotten, freeze-dried meals.

if only i 

could find a place 

that’s mine,

i pioneered.   

but stepless paths

and monkeyed maths

breed impotency feared.

and in the end,

they prod and push,  

seduce you with sweet scams,  

while they commandeer  

and claim,
hey we’re  

just shepherds of stray lambs.  

they’ll try to point   

you to a map

without a compass rose,

and still profess,   

all we do’s for you,  

that’s just the way life goes…

though treaties signed  

can coo and woo,

mere paper won’t absolve them.

“that’s one small step…”

i just can’t take.

houston,   

…we have a problem.