Love with fear, Love without trust

My heart, my love, my joy and my pain. When will it end? When can I dream freely? Is there ever going to be another day where I can call you mine without hiding, without fear, without consequences, without disapproval. I want you to have the best life I want you to be the best you can be. I've watched you grow and I've seen you sink. But I've always been there for you and I always will. I just wonder if you feel the way I feel. T I cried cause I couldn't find you. Yesterday I cried because I thought I lost you. I thought I would never see you again. I thought I would never lay on your chest and listen to the beat of your rhythmic heart. Your my advisor and my king. You are my comfort and my peace. Without you I fall apart. I hurt because of the past and I'm scared because of the future. I trust you but I have flashbacks that ruin my judgement. I love you. Don't give up and don't fall into temptation.