I remember your brave face through all the pain
The day you told me, I tried to remain sane.
After that news I cracked
I felt like a car hit with sudden impact
Somehow you had such strong will
Through the drugs, chemo, and pill.
While something ate you inside,
It didn’t faze you; even at your bedside.
That one evil thing was a wildfire;
An active multiplier.
I found out it was metastatic;
Something emphatic, traumatic, erratic.
People joke about cancer like its no big deal
Like it’s a walk in the park or a branch on a reel
Sometimes cancer cannot be cured
Nothing can be assured
I understand you're free now,
But the pain of watching you go would still plow. - (personification)
You were so strong,
And you fought for so long
Three years later.
And never would be on a ventilator.
I was on my knees
Begging "god please"
You had all of the agony
Transferred to me so calmly.
I know you're proud though.
Up in the sky, aglow, in your own bungalow.
To my mom, who has been missing for 1,228 days:
I know you continue to amaze
To my mom, my best friend,
I hope you get this message I send.
I hate that you're gone.
But mostly, I hate that I couldn't hold on.