Memories

Seeing a dead man on a chair,

the father of my father,

soulless and cold like never before;

Changed my life forever,

while I witnessed his life go out the door.

Tasting the tears that roll down my face,

a salty lake of sorrow,

caressing the sides of my head.

Feeling nothing but dread,

knowing that what I once loved is now dead.

I got nothing better to do than to await for the apprehension to attack.

So I’m mourning like there’s no tomorrow, begging god for my grandpa back.

As a child, I was barely known. Growing up it was the same.

All the kids laughed and tease; toying with my innocence like a game.

Everyday, I was wishing that I would make one friend,

but that was only an unsuccessful task in the end.

So while people are outside with friends, I’m home alone writing.

But I can never fixate while both of my parents were vehemently fighting.   

I got nothing better to do than to await for imminent peace,

So I’m praying like there’s no tomorrow, saying, “God take me please.”

I learned reality the hard way, “Once you become happy, you just die.”

But I refuse to accept that cause that would mean that what we are living for,

is only a lie.

So why?

We’re only going through life without living it,

We’re all savages for love but I know we’re never giving it.

We’re selfish and that’s a matter that’s very daunting.

Even I renounce my memories cause those reminders are very haunting.  

I got nothing better to do with my life than to anticipate on going far,

while I’m praying to god asking, “Where the hell you are?”

Amen.