Metamorphosis

I sit and ponder and remember when, I felt like I was on the outside of my life always looking in

I’d watch my peers as their bright lights shone, and I would sit by feeling forever alone.

I had a few friends along the way, but never anyone that would prove worthy to stay.

I have a great family; they are who made me feel safe

I would nestle down in with them when the world began to chafe.

Now, mom got me help, and I went often enough

Dr. Julie, I liked, she helped me realize everyone has “stuff”.

I had a secret that I’m now willing to share,

One that held me prisoner and filled me with despair.

I have lived with anxiety for most of my life; it had chained me down and stolen my light.

When I was 14 I got really sick, and I was in the hospital for 13 nights

I left the hospital in a wheelchair, where I’d end up spending the next year

What was wrong?  No one knew.  All the tests were unclear.

I became the faceless freshman, no one looked me in the eye

There were days I would beg my mom not to go, and yes, days I wanted to die

But they finally diagnosed me and I started to make my way back to well

Yet still, I was perishing in my own personal hell.

Then one day on a whim, my mom said, ‘I’ve got something to try

But you aren’t going to be for it’, and that was no lie.

Off we went to a hypnotist, for an appointment for me

Never once did I believe that she would finally set me free

So with doubt in my mind, I sat in her chair at the beginning of my senior year

Now I have a story that I want all to hear.

When once I was a wallflower and wanted no one to look at me

I headlined a high school lip sync contest and was out there for all to see

If you’d told me that hypnotherapy could be so life changing, I would have probably said you were crazy

I am so glad I did it though, because now those terrible days are hazy.

I am no longer afraid, I speak my mind, and I am truly and finally whole

I can enter my grown up life in control and the director of my own soul

I know there are those who are filled with doubt, but I encourage you to try it out

Because I was once a faceless girl in a wheelchair, and now I’m in your face

I no longer hide in the shadows; I am that girl at the head of the race

Whether it really works or I just think that it did

I wish I’d have done it sooner and gotten myself back onto the grid

No more missed opportunities, no more shackles and chains

No more hiding in the basement every time that it rains

No more friendlessness, no more missed dances

I’m embracing college life and taking my chances!