Mirror

Monday: A quick glance. I can't stand to see what everyone else sees, let alone what I see in me. Tuesday: I take a long look while smiling to make sure my depression is tucked tightly away today. Wednesday: I can't smile while I look. Wonder if others can see as deeply in me as I see. I hope what I see won't show, but all that is seen are the bags under my eyes, the wrinkles of age, the weight from lack of self love and love from others. Thursday: Smile. Maybe they won't ask questions. Maybe they won't see my scars of self hatred. Friday: A full body glance. Suck in your stomach that evolved from deprivation as a child. The internal scars of others telling you how you should look, lead to this look. You hate what you see. Saturday: Today will be a good day. Smile. Repeat. Fake it. Sunday: A day of healing. You don't love what you see, but you hope next week you'll start to accept it, or change to appreciate it.