Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Looking in the mirror I say I’m ugly,
I say I’m fat, I say I’m disgusting.
Who would want to be with you?
(Shit not me)
Or is the aspect of who I am in which differs on who
I want to be.
I just want to be accepted, for I am and not my body
Why can’t you see I am who I am, and you’re not me?
I been through this so many times, why can’t you see.
That I’m not skinny, I’m not petite.
I have an appetite, I like to eat
Now is that a crime, is that a sin?
I’m confused, where do I begin?

It all started when I 10 years old, I was told by my step-dad
To “shut my fat ass up”
A rebuttal in on my part was righteous
But, not yet…
At this age I couldn’t process everything
This scared me till this day, for in my dad’s eyes I’m still over weight.

I started to change, my waist got smaller.
My ego got taller, and more people started talking to me.
In process, I forgot who I was.
That strong person in the beginning
That in my eyes was winning, now losing
Who I really am.

I’m free, free to do anything and never give a damn on how
Anyone felt.
My heart melts till this day when I think back to my past.
That person who was bullied, talked about, stabbed in the back.
Now as I as move forward, I will always look back for comfort
On how far I came.
Remember I’m free, to venture out to places that have never been seen
And will not have to debate about my weight, because I’m happy to be ME