MISTAKE #1

March 26, 2020

I never said stop, but I never said go.

Now people at school call me a hoe.

What was I supposed to do? You had me trapped in a corner.

Walking away became harder and harder.

Your lips on my lips

And your hand in my skirt.

In the moment it felt great,

But now the memories hurt.

That was only the first.

There were more to come: before school, after school, even during lunch.

I couldn’t get enough of you.

I always wanted more.

My little secret, my hidden trap door.

We would talk for hours,

And it never got old.

We talked about our hopes and dreams and fantasies.

I let my guard down and told you everything,

my family issues, my darkest secrets.

You know it all.

But then the day came when you wanted more,

You wouldn’t take no, and I didn’t feel like fighting about it anymore.

So at the end of lunch I gave you that look, and you knew what I meant, I had you hooked.

So after school in the empty music room is where we met then to the instrument storage room, the place I wish I could forget.

That's where it happened, where you violated me.

You pushed me too far and blocked the door, but at the same time you made me want more

Then you said something that made me freeze.

My response to you was “oh fuck no!”

But that's not what you wanted to hear.

You made that clear when you held me down,

But the rest is a blur.

Now I still feel the hurt and pain

It'll never go away,

So thank you, again, for even more shame...

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