Misunderstood

Mike was a lonely pirate

He had no friends in the crew.

People looked at him as a tyrant

And because of this he was blue.

Unlike most, he didn’t drink rum.

He didn’t drink beer or whiskey.

And a sober pirate is always a bum

When things start to get frisky.

The crew would dance, and drink, and laugh

Throwing back pints of rum.

Then point to Mike as if he were half,

The pirate of the sum.

Mike loved to write, he loved to sing

He loved to read, and listen.

But in the pirate wing of things

He surely wouldn’t glisten.

So one dark night he took his boat

He took his Twain and Bach.

He left for land and took his coat

To find a place to dock.

He landed in a great big city

With hopes of a new career.

But very fast things went shitty

And he found himself on a pier.

 “I miss my pirates, I miss my friends,

I miss the stench of beer.

I miss the way they used to laugh

Whenever I came near.”

So good ol’ Mike, he grabbed his books

He grabbed some beers and boos.

Mike set on out for a second look,

And set his boat on cruise.

Four days at sea Mike had no luck,

No ship or pirates in sight.

But still he continued on this ruck,

And paddled all through the night.

To stay alive he drank the beer,

He ate anything he could squander.

But shortly after he lost all cheer,

And his mind started to wander.

So one sunny day, he decided swim.

A decision he made while blasted.

But while he was out he lost a limb

To a shark that had just fasted.

All through the night Mike bled and cried

He colored the sea like Moses.

But hours passed, and soon he died

Hypovolemia was the prognosis.