Mixed Signals

I try to understand,
but obviously get no understanding
There are signs that I follow
Unspoken but understandable words
And yet, you're making me feel illiterate
I'm not understanding
It was clear
Crystal, translucent
And yet, I'm here.
At a crossroads of signs you've created
Signs of contradiction
Signs that'll frustrate a blind man
It's confusing me.
You are confusing me
What is it that you want from me?

My favorite game is twister
I follow the simple directions
I move when I'm told,
Where I'm told
An understanding game.
But this game?
I want out
I follow directions
I lose.
I don't follow them,
I still fucking lose
If I keep losing,
I'll lose myself in this game,
To this game
To you.
Then what becomes of me?
The hollow shell of what I was?
Walking heartbreak,
Void of all positive emotions?
I think the fuck not.

I quit this game,
My cards were already on the table.
Spread and showing for all to see
Yet yours are still hiding from my view.
I quit being your puppet
I cut all ties and strings of you from me
You can't play with me anymore.
I refuse.
I'm done with thisconfusing game,
I'm done with losing,
And mostly,
I'm done with you