You don’t know how long it’s taken me to write down these words

These words will scorn me for the rest of my life

I tried to talk myself out of these feelings, I’ve tried to talk sense into myself

Just as you’ve taught me

But I can’t…

Mom, Dad,

I’m gay.

I can already see your faces turning in complete dismay

I see the fire in your eyes

The fire that I have so often been burned by

That’s why my heart has turned to ice

To quench the fire

I can see you shaking your heads, refusing to accept the truth

You shake your heads at my words trying to rid their filth from your mind

Just as you have rid every other truth that I have confessed to you

You are disappointed in me….

You never saw it coming and honestly neither did I.

You tell me it’s a sin. That I will go to hell for being a homosexual

And I know this… But I also know God

And I know he will be much more forgiving than you ever will be

Mom, Dad, you don’t know how much strength it’s taking me to admit this to you because I know

This… This “Sin” will destroy my relationship with you…

Forever…

You’ve raised us right but I came out so wrong…

Please listen to me…

This is not a cry for attention like you thought my cutting

This is not something  I’ll just recover from, like you thought of my eating disorder

This is not some sick an disgusting thing like my porn addiction

Mom! Dad!

I’ve been your perfect little puppet for too long!

I love her! I love her a lot!

Shake your heads, shoot me with fire, look at me in disgust

But it doesn’t change the fact

That I’m gay

And you can never accept me…