The monster in your eyes

This is how I knew I was a woman.

Everyone has some story like this one, maybe not this extreme but something similar.

Your fingers brush my thigh, 

It doesn’t bring me that happy feeling, like in the past. 

I feel disgusted. 

But not at you, 

At myself for letting you do it. 

The feel of you sweating on me still sends shivers down my spine. 

I can’t look myself in the mirror, 

nor look you in the eyes. 

All I see is the monster, 

Ever since you left those brusies on my inner thighs, my stomach, even my throat as you held me down. 

Hurting me was fun for you wasn’t it?

You finally showed me the monster hidden behind those eyes. 

You laughed when you saw the tears run from my eyes. 

It used to be my favorite sound in the world. 

Bruises coating my body. 

Showing the monster in your eyes, and leaving him in my nightmares.