Mother Judas

I was left as an orphan because of your addiction Because you loved to suck in the smoke more than you loved blowing me kisses You kissed me on the cheek and promised me the world but dumped me in the ditches I’m blowing in the wind like a piece of trash, left to carry my own cross. Mother Judas, where are now? You’re digging yourself into a hole where you cannot be found. Look at me mother, I’m bruised and I’m broken I regret all of those year where I went unspoken I was left as an adult because you weren’t a parent Because I had to learn to be on my own and wash my own dishes You were just a friend and never a guardian partying it up and leaving again We didn’t see you for weeks so how could I even call you my mother? You didn’t deserve the title of “the nurturer,” “the caregiver,” or even “mommy” No, you left a sick and dying man with three young children whose cancer was killing us all Mother Judas, where are you now? I don’t think I even care if you’re ever found. Look at me mother, I’m stronger and I’m alive. I want to thrive and not just survive.