PoemsBrowse PoemsSlamsFresh DropEchoes
LearnWriting TipsPoetry TermsPoets & ArtistsBooksFor Teachers
ExplorePoetry GenomePoem MapEchoesTake ActionGroups
AboutWrite a PoemDonateSign UpLog In

In The Mountains


These are our mountains,

brown spires that pierce the Earth's crust,

where our clans reside.

We are mountaineers,

brigades of rogues so I say,

that raid towns near us.

What is this I see?

A villiage protected vast,

which shall burn tonight.

At the dusk of night,

we stalk like snakes on field mice.

With hundreds of flames.

We attack swiftly.

Burning all in the way of...

our campaign of death.

When the sun rises,

ash and smoke only remain.

Under our mountain,

Peak...

©All Rights Reserved

Something wrong with this poem?

Share

Replies are closed for this poem.

JDcraft91

I'm a 23 year old college student based out of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Currently working on a full length novel as of Aug 2012 and have a few short stories as well. Open to any feedback, criticism, etc and if interested in knowing more about me or offering professional editing services, please email me at [email protected]

View all poems →

Your Poem's Voice

See what makes your poem unique — its voice, energy, themes, and the literary traditions it draws from.

Comments (1)

QV
<p>When I read this particular piece, I thought it could have gone one of two ways. The first is a naturalistic description &quot;brown spires that pierce...&quot; and the second (which you chose) a narrative. In all honesty, I feel the narrative course is a bit prosaic and superficial. There is need to make the piece short, and this takes away the details normally attributed to a narrative. Q.V.</p>

Log in to leave a comment.