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My Demon


You fought me.

you spent years of my life

tearing me to pieces and whispering

to me that I was worthless.  

I spent so much of my time

struggling under your weight that

I forgot who I was and what I wanted.

 

You worked with me.

after the screaming and crying,

the pleading for my sanity and my existence,

I found solace.

we embraced each other as friends

and put problems into perspective.

I finally could find my peace.

 

You wait.

I know you are always there,

hidden in the farthest corners of my mind,

biding your time for when the hold

I have on you will falter.

there are so many days,

days where I can’t wake up,

moments where I can’t think straight,

where inspiration evades me because

you have determined it to.

but you still wait.

 

I grow stronger.

every new attack you send my way

the armies you set loose inside me

and the swords they swing to bring me down

only serve to toughen my skin.

I am tired of fighting you

and so now I let you go,

let you sink further into the background

as I tell myself that I will see the sun again.

the darkness that strangled me

with your help

is not as powerful,

and every new breath I take,

dirt caked beneath my nails from where I

clawed from the earthen grave you put me in,

is like crying with relief.

because I am stronger,

even when I am broken.

 

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hallar

Kalon is an agender, asexual, and aromantic individual currently in their fifth year of college. They are studying for their English degree with a concentration in Literary Studies. Kalon hopes to travel some day and intends to further take their studies into graduate school in order to pursue their PhD in English.

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