My Least Favorite Things

Unrealistic dialogue in romantic movies,

Teenage females who still think boys have cooties,

When I’m home alone at night and the doorbell rings,

These are a few of my least favorite things.

Opening doors leading into dark places,

Replacing my Converse high top shoelaces,

Voice cracking teenage boys trying to sing,

These are a few of my least favorite things.

When I’m tired,

When I’m grumpy,

When I’m feeling bad,

I simply remember my least favorite things,

And then I feel even more mad.

Teenage boys who will not respect the friendzone,

Family inquiring the state of my hormones,

Shopping for swimsuits or shoes or for jeans,

These are a few of my least favorite things.

Guys who make dirty jokes in front of ladies,

People who try to force me to like babies,

Christian films that lack a plot and a theme,

These are a few of my least favorite things.

When I’m tired,

When I’m grumpy,

 When I’m feeling bad,

I simply remember my least favorite things,

And then I feel even more mad.

Telling a joke people don’t think is funny,

Wanting more books but not having the money,

Allergies striking right before I sing,

These are a few of my least favorite things.

Plans changing without any type of warning,

When my favorite band sings a song I find boring,

Cheap earrings that make my ear lobes turn green,

These are a few of my least favorite things.

When I’m tired,

When I’m grumpy,

When I’m feeling bad,

I simply remember my least favorite things,

And then I feel even more mad.