My new idea of us

That feeling I use to get when you were so close to me;

the butterflies in my stomach, my heart racing, and a warm sensation throughout my body

When you talk to me so sweet that the smile on my face grows and I turn red

When you hold me close and I lean my head back and gasping for a breath

When you look at me and smile because we both know we feel the same way

My fingers trace your face and flow through your short curls

As we kiss we both become powerless

The kisses you gave me from my face to my neck make me powerless and dizzy, they make me swoon and want more

As we have our bodies pressed against each other and the fire between us grows bigger and stronger and hotter

With every new touch I want this to continue or at least I did

When that happened all I knew was you

I use to grab you holding you close not wanting to let go

This was my memory of us

I tried to go further for you because I wanted to be your everything but I was scared

I thought maybe instead of just a memory it will become a reality because all I wanted was you

 This was my idea of us

But then you hurt me

You should me love you took me in your house in your arms, then the next day you act like nothing happened

So fuck you,

Fuck you

I don’t care anymore

I am done

I am through

I don’t even know how I put up with you

You lied to me and I believed you

You broke my heart

Treated me like this was all a game

But this was no game when I put my emotions in,

I fell and I fell hard

I fell flat on my face and you walked past as if I was okay

But I am not so how do you act like nothing happened?

I really want to know because maybe I should find a way to mask my feelings

Knowing that I fell and I picked myself up knowing you would just tear me down again

So as I said before fuck you

I am done

I will not fall for you anymore

I refuse because I love me more

So I am letting go of my old idea of us

Because this is how I now see you

I now see you as a liar

A fake

And a cheat

Because when I was waiting for you

you were not waiting for me

So I am done

This is my new idea of us