My Origin Story

I am from Fullerton

A place where railroad tracks met orange groves

Where my childhood met reality

I am from the city

But not like, tall buildings and smog

But a place with scenic neighborhoods and old brick theaters

I am from palm trees and sunshine that is brighter than my future

I am from bike races and skateboards

From tomboy t-shirts and beat up sneakers

Torn jeans and bloody knees

I am from womanhood

And manhood

And anything in between

I come from a gender identity that some people claim doesn't actually exist

I come from a place where my sexuality is used as a curse

My appearance as an insult

I come from a religion where I am the leper

With my skin leaking a sinful sexuality 

And I am begging on my knees for change

Because it apparently costs more than one broken soul to purchase

I am from a place where living no longer seems worth it

Where the voices in my head are louder than my speaking voice

That's usually why I talk so loud 

I am from therapy sessions and multiple mixtures of medications

A cocktail of happiness that doesn't actually work

I am from razors and stitches

From vacations in hospital beds and daydream getaways

I come from staring contests with my scars 

And playing truth or dare with my demons

I come from long walks along my sanity and holding hands with my memories

Desperately trying to hang on to my innocence

Dreaming I can fly away to Neverland

But every day dream has to come to an end

I come from growing up

I don't come from you

I come from me.