Myself

I am and will always be, myself.

Smiles show on my face, though inwardly I cry.

Though I appear independent, my heart yearns for company.

The friends I have don't know me fully, for everybody keeps secrets.

They see me through their filters, bright eye'd and wonderful.

But put me through no filters, and you will see

That I am broken, struggling with identity.

Wondering why can't I just fall in love with her instead of secrecy.

However, I am loyal to my friends, caring and nurturing, encouraging and lifting,

But neglecting to do the same to myself.

I see the good in others, but see the worst in me.

For who can see the good in oneself, when you are something your family shuns?

They don't know, of course they don't know.

The ones at school make slurs and jokes that prod and belittle me, though not intentionally.

For they don't know who I am, who I struggle to be.

I am myself, but no one will see it.