Nae Sarang, A Black Woman

Relief he feels and skin tan wilmington against firm pressed lips melanin

“Yes, I’ll be your girlfriend!”

I’ve never wanted to say in person

Pushing him away as I robbed him of my affection

Excitement drained of my eyes

And unwrapping my arms from around his neck.

Stepped 2 back take I

“Can you be my girlfriend?”

Minseok swallowed back in his throat

As anxiety ascends

He nervously grins and lets go of my hand

I divert my attention

Taking my last whiff of his comfortable cinnamon embrace

Because his hands never gave my shoulder friction

My eyes travel around in confliction

Because this is my chance, losing confidence

“Eotteokhae? Eotteokhae? Oh my gosh!! What do I do?”

You leave instead of greeting me with a grin

So, maybe I hugged you too tight

That my “annyeonghaseyo” was too tight lipped

So you slipped through the cracks of my life

“Oppa! Oppa!”

“Bogoshipda”

I miss you so much

That I forgot I only needed to make one lunch or that you are gone

On that 15 hour flight of butterflies

That has left my stomach

Because I’ve friend zone you

With you constant lessons of my “yeobo”

Or my  “namja chingu”

Because you weren’t more than a friend.

You were that Korean guy that taught me korean

In exchange for English lessons

“No, you hang up first..”

“Call me when you get home”

“Saranghaeyo”

“How was school?”

“I’ll send you tteokbokki”

“Do you want some peach cobbler?”

“neo neomu gwiyeowo”

“I think I like you”

But it only took 12 seconds to erase our messages

Because we never happened