Negative Feelings

Listless

Scared

Anxious

Depressed

Feelings that are commonplace in my life

Staring in the mirror

A disgusting creature stares back

One that I’m ashamed of

That I hate

But I can’t rip my eyes away

It’s a hypnotizing sight

Regardless of the negative feelings

It bestows upon me

The smile that plays on my face

Couldn’t be more fake

The happiness in my eyes

Couldn’t be more false

I’m trapped in a void

A deep black ocean

Drowning

No hopes of reaching the surface

I run from those feelings though

I hide

Scream at them to go away

Force the pills down my throat

Pray for the numbness

To overcome me in all of its sweet relief

I beg for my own version of a filter

Because the real me

Is one I never want see nor be