Never Skinny

Stupid

Ugly

Fat

Imperfect

These are the words used to describe people

In society

Always comparing one’s self to

Models and actors

Never tall or thin enough

Hiding away in the bathroom

After dinner

Looking in the mirror and always seeing

Something disgusting

Never skinny

Everyone always judging you

Society making you feel like you

Have to look not BE beautiful

Never letting anyone see the real you

Crying all night and feeling

Sick, nasty, raw – this pain always there

Nobody ever there

Keeping everything to yourself

Till you break down and drown in your sorrows

Never skinny

These insecurities driving you crazy

Telling people to leave you alone

When all you want is for them to hug you

And tell you it’s going to be okay

Looking around the room

And wondering why can’t I look like her

Never skinny

Looking in a mirror and thinking

I’m not me if I’m not thin

Hiding this deep dark secret

The painful memories

Haunting you through the night

This sick obsession

Constantly in the mind

Trying to escape 

But always found

Feeling empty and incomplete

Never skinny

Why can’t I be perfect

This “goal” driving a person insane

These scars reminding me

That this is real

Believing fat is failure

Looking at my reflection

And seeing a different person every time

Hiding behind this disguise

Lost and confused

Broken hearted

Wanting to die

Never skinny

Not even recognizing yourself

That small voice

Telling you no one loves you

This is out of control

This constant battle

Of eating or fighting it

All I want is to escape

I want to ignore this

Sick voice

Why can’t I be strong enough

This is my own fault

But I can’t help it

I want to reclaim my life

I want to express what I’m feeling

Not what people want to hear

I want a future without

Fear and this disease

I want to accept my body

I want hope for tomorrow

I want all this hate to go away

I want someone to listen and care

But most of all I want to believe

That it doesn’t matter if I’m

Never skinny