nicotine

I sit with fucking nicotine burning between my lips,

the taste is disgusting but so satisfying at the same time. 

It fills me with disgust, 

and relief.

I want to die when I don't have it, 

and would do anything for it.

It is my weakness,

and controls me all the time.

All I can think about is the cancer that is going to form within me,

and the pain it will bring.

I still put that fucking shit between my lips, 

hoping someone would notice me.

I sit and contemplate,

is it worth it?

Yes. 

Nobody wants to be with me except sweet nicotine.

I wonder what would my life be like without it,

without the shit we call nicotine.