Night blends

My nightmare inaugurates But each time the light grows dimmer... Bizarre temperature changes Cold shivers Monotonous dyed walls Causing bone quivers This shit is weird I find myself...dispassionate Treading water down lone rivers Scatter brained until I reach my demise Tryna flee tick tocks from force feeding my mind Food for thought until I portrayed bulimic signs So I didn't apologize when I bit the hand of time It only proved that even in my dreams I couldn't dodge reality if I tried... I'm trying to grasp this...nightmare... This mindset of a mind of a poetic blender... I'm tryna decipher how it suspend pretenders Offend contenders Make winner's surrender Then blend agendas to dismember their members All without temper Mail out my bullshit Without a care in the world Until karma return to sender Is this what it consist of? Straggling from that lone river... Head first into an ocean... All mental thoughts, no words spoken Does my character define the path I've chosen? Does it make my heart golden or frozen? I find myself...dispassionate But should a broken heart remain open? I mean this shit is weird Am I drowning? Are my nightmares driven by emotion?