I live in the darkness

I can hear the blades get sharpened

i am cold and wet

All i have is this carpet, which i use as a blanket

I do what i'm told and my stomach is still flat

I'm all bones and i'm probably stanking

I never had fun

I've been here so long i don't know if i'm old or young

i am with-out space it's hard to move

I am with-out face

I have no skin to feel smooth

Am I trapped inside this place, or am I wrapped inside my emotions from all the disgrace

Fall, I remember falling and hitting the ground

Call, I use to call for help

I feel and touch around but know one is there

Lashes, Deep Cuts in my back there goes the belt

Am I a blind or a slave who's problems will always worsing

I wish i could see color

All i hear is cursing and he's not my fucking brother

I stopped listening why bother

But i heard Why? i'm not his fucking father

I think he's pissing

I sit and wonder if anyone know's i'm missing

shhh.. I hear people walking its sounds like my religious mom in the kitchen

I feel like a dog like I am the runt

I only eat twice a month

I'm starving i crave for affection i have sores i probably have an infection

Someones coming! Its just kids i want to play

something kicks me it's bear sized but I can't move because i'm paralyzed

They gave me food but I don't know what I ate

They throw me on the ground and say it's because i'm a little boy who's gay

It was all just my contadicting conscience plotting against me everyday

It was how i was treated that made my state of mind and emotions run away

Because i had know one to ever share this part of me.