No fear

Time has passed it should.be easy now
my heart should settle faster.some.how
My skin shouldn't scrape.the air for comfort 
My heart shouldnt fear the worst
My brain should not tremble at the repeating CD.of his voice
my stomach should.stop vibrating from guilt.from my choice.
My voice demands to stop mumbling
Afraid of him reoccurring 
My feet should.be oh so familiar with this .road
They know their.way around & back home
My lips command.to be pried open
Afraid the truth would let trouble open
My arms..can.stop flailing about wild and untamed
Because I am.home but am i insane
If I am.still afraid of this strangers face
I am.still afraid to sleep because of that place
I am still trembling shaking shivering and its not from the cold
Its.because of the stranger's.massive hold
I am free,  breathing & still alive
So why am I acting like didn't survive
Yet everything the stranger & the offer was just a nightmare
nothing actually happened but it got me scared 
The situation was just a mad game my brain made
It woke.me up crying thought I was.dying because.I gave up trying 
But they say time will heal the.broken 
I am right here, on my knees & arms wide.open
Embrace it,  face it,  race it then finaly efface it