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I don't wear makeup

I smile a lot

But on the inside I don't really know if I'm happy

I'm getting everything that I want

And everything that I've worked hard for

but it feels like nothing to me

without my dad here

I miss him everyday

its been about 6 months since his passing

but each day gets harder instead of easier

I still smile

I don't like people to see me cry

I try to keep moving forward

I know my dad wants me to succeed

and I am so proud of myself for living my dream

of getting into veterinary school

to become the doctor I wish my father was here to see

as I write this I still try to be happy

I know my dad is proud of me

without all the smiles

I'm broken

I'm living through a trauma that I don't know how to deal with

I'm trying to become the person I want to be

To be the person my dad can be proud of

The smiles will be real

No filter.