#Nofilter

If I took a selfie for every moment of my story, would the pictures reflect all the pain in my life?

If I matched every post on Facebook of #snowdaywiththegirls and #omgthispicturemakesmelookstupidlol, would the reality of my everyday life show through?

Haters would comment on my Instagram telling me what I already fear:

That I’m ugly, that I’m stupid, that I really don’t fit in.

If I photo shopped every picture to perfection, would my pictures even show me anymore?

If I were to yell out “Selfie” in the middle of class, how many kids would have a camera-ready smile and how many would look like that back end of an ass?

Some would beg me to delete it and others would want it posted, yet it’s the poses and posers that earn the spotlights while anyone real fades into the background.

Kodak ready pictures with model ready poses make it to the Internet but the ones of us being us are sent to the trash.

Society’s message is to be acceptable is to be perfect, but to be you is to be garbage.

If I were to keep the photos of me as I am, would I be able to look past the bad lighting and half-open eyes?

My hair sticking up on one side and the pimple on my cheek are the real me, but I am ashamed to be me.

Angling my camera and tilting my head is all that I have; catching my good side reminds me I even have a good side. My ego and confidence depend on that veil- that mask isn’t for others, it’s for plain old me.

Without the filters, there is no way to hide the real me.

But I use those filters because of #Iamafraidoftherealme.